I'm not bossy, I just know what YOU should be doing.

Me and my accomodating surgeon, Dr. Comitalo

Some who know me may realize that I have the tiniest bit of impatience in my personality . So, it should not be a surprise that I want to be healed from my surgery NOW! Alas, it is not completely possible, but the last of my three surgical drains was removed on Monday, along with the only surface stitches.

For those lucky enough not to have experienced it, I'll explain that the surgeon left drains penetrating my skin. Each consists of a sturdy bag with a valve and a long tube attached. The tube goes through the skin and is held in place with a surface stitch. Compressing the bag and closing the valve causes pressure to be exerted so that fluid from inside the wounded area is pulled out and into the bag. Twice a day the bag is emptied by opening the valve and squeezing out the contents. The volume of fluid is measured and the amount recorded. (It is helpful to be comfortable with blood, and protein, and fluid of various colors while emptying and measuring.)

When the day came for the final drain to be removed, I began worrying about the pain I anticipated. To remove the drains, the surgeon removed the stitches (a little painful), placed a couple of fingers on my skin either side of the hole and very rapidly pulled the bag and attached drain out of me! Fortunately, I didn't feel it on the inside, but my skin definately had plenty of working pain receptors.

The first two were painful, and they were not nearly as inflamed as the third one which remained in me for several more days. That thing was SORE! So, being a "take charge" kind of person, I decided I should have a local anesthetic before the drain came out. I called my surgeon's office and suggested to his assistant that I should have a local. She said that she had never known him to do it and muttered something about people being afraid of needles and not wanting another hole poked in their skin. Altogether, she seemed somewhat resistant to the idea, which was not exactly an acceptable response. I sid it was easy for her to say it wasn't necessary since it wasn't her who had the drain! Getting nowhere in my reasoning with her, I finally asked her to tell the surgeon what I wanted when he came in. Fortunately, when I arrived he was prepared with a lovely needle and syringe of local anesthetic which made the removal almost painless, the only pain being the minor stinging when the injection began. I engaged him in a little discussion about how much better this was and told him he ought to offer a local to everyone. I wonder if he will.

I think I'll confiscate my administrative assistant's desk ornament which reads, "I'm not bossy, I just know what YOU should be doing."